Wednesday, May 13, 2009

Gathright for Freel AND Farney

There's been plenty of talk in the media, the blogospheroids, and inside Ryan Freel's own head about his imaginary friend, Farney. He says it's all a joke, according to Paul Sullivan as well as his latest appearance on ESPN 1000 with Waddle and Silvy. Here's what I gathered from that interview:
  • Ryan Freel isn't crazy, but he does have a few screws loose.
  • Farney doesn't live in his head, but that doesn't mean the demons in there are silent.
  • Ryan is a Hulk Hogan brother-er. Yeah, he'll drop the Hoganesque, "brother," exclamation as frequently as Canadians say, "eh." It's beautiful.
  • He hates the Orioles and doesn't want to talk about them.
  • He really, really wants to talk about them, but Waddle and Silvy were too dumb or chicken to probe the issue.
  • Ryan Freel has no speech filter, and he loves to talk candidly to whoever will listen.
Awesome. We finally have a player who will say inappropriate, hilarious stuff into microphones real and imaginary. That talent was hidden in Cincinnati and Baltimore, but it's about to hit the big time. This is Chicago, where the media loves to blow Zambrano references about Yankee Stadium amenities into doctoral dissertations about why Wrigley Field should be demolished. I can hardly wait to see what happens when Freel actually does give his thesis on Baltimore, McFail, steroids, and who knows what else. Personally, I hope Freel sticks around long enough to become this city's biggest sideshow since the Unholy Rodman Empire. 

He's gonna be the most quotable guy in town, even if Farney never says another word.
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