|They've done it like this. They've done it like that. They should try it with a Wiffle Ball bat.|
Top Ten Ideas to Get D-Lee and A-Ram Hitting
10. Stop calling them D-Lee and A-Ram.
9. Let them use Wiffle Ball bats for increased bat speed.
8. Three words: Little. Jerry. Seinfeld.
7. Have them look in the mirror. That's what they all suggested Milton Bradley do, anyway.
6. Last one to get a hit each game wears the Hello Kitty backpack.
5. Convince them that while their abysmal start has been an absolute joke, it's still no replacement for Kevin Millar.
4. Give their mothers 10-year visas.
3. After three strikes: bring out the tee.
2. Substitute their advanced scouting videos with 15 hours of Lou Piniella saying, "Look, I don't know what else I can do."
1. 1980s campy movie solution: most triumphant video.